Everyday Hell and Family

Writing this has been so hard on me. Mentally hard. There is so much more to this story and I promise I will get it all on here. 

At this point I suffer from severe PTSD and two of my kids suffer from PTSD. All 3 kids have behaviour problems since coming home. We each have our good days and our bad days. Some days we are happy and some days we cry. We trust no one in this world anymore and that includes extended family.

Unless you have lived this hell you can never begin to understand where we are coming from. It has been so hard on everyone but I think I have dealt with it the worst from family. I went from having a very close relationship with my 11 brothers and sisters, nieces/nephews, my parents, grandparents to having none of them. I grew up being taught family was everything and in the end it has been nothing. Yes I talk to my parents but have seen them maybe 3 times in 2 years and talk to them very little on the phone. My siblings all except for 2 turned on me the minute this happened. My grandfather passed away shortly after this happened and my Aunt refused to allow us to come to the funeral home. My grandmother actually told me I had been nothing but trouble from the day I was born.

Do I feel sorry for myself? No I don’t. Do I wish I had done things different? Oh yes I do. Do I know how to heal? Not a clue. Am I angry? I’m so pissed off it isn’t even funny. Is this blog going to make people mad? I’m 100%sure it is going to make a lot of people very mad. Is that my intention? No it really isn’t.

I want our story to help others. I hope this helps us heal. I hope we can get justice with our story. I hope our story helps other families from living the hell we have lived.